How do You show respect?

So training didn't go so well.
I blew my shoulder against another lad. We're both quite strong and we're trying to reach the correct position for our training during Chi Sao drills. This often an issue I've noticed.

There's an ideal position for each person to get the best result out of the execution of a 'manoeuvre'. In this scenario you're stopping your opponent from getting the stronger/dominant/controlling line, and thus you control your opponents centre. You're training toward our collective goal. Have the better line.
This is the limitation I find...Chi Sao isn't fighting. It's a training tool. As such you have to allow your opponent to win from time to time so they can see where they're best to position themselves, or you help them program poor positioning by not being accommodating. Basically being a dick.
For me, in Chi Sao, I find that having a Tan Sao at 90° (perpendicular) to my body gives me a good position, and a strong line. It allows me to to keep my elbow locked to my waist.
Doing this messes with my training partner though. My shoulders are about a metre wide, this means my partners fook sao is going to be pushed outwards into an uncomfortable position while trying to maintain a good attacking line. So Mr. Fook tries to compensate by winning back the centre. All of a sudden Mr. Fook's intention has the resultant force directed across his own body, not towards his partner. The forward intention mutates into this 'big-dickery' scenario.

Where in this practice does the co-operation come?
We've all had training partners that are co-operative, and partners who aren't. We deal with this.
This is often a great opportunity to verbally bridge the gap, talk to them, and try to come to an understanding. What if this doesn't work?

Do you learn anything from someone who refuses to co-operate? Does working with a 'solely self-interested' individual provide an opportunity for your improvement?
My temper often gets the better of me. I point out that I couldn't possibly learn x if they're going to behave y. Is this reasonable though?
Communicating with your partner is, in my conceited opinion, really important for both.
Each person should have an opportunity to command dominance, and to also be defeated.

This sort of brings forward another idea. At least it does within my internal cause and effect matrix.

What is the motivator here? Or more accurately put, where is your mind at the time, compared to your training partners mind?
I spend a lot of time away from class, and as a result I try to mentally apply the discipline I physically lack, throughout the day.
In the context of Bong Sao, I will spend moments throughout the day thinking of a slow-motion projection of the path my arm takes. When i react, perhaps to a surprise attack, am I expecting my elbow to make a straight(ish) line towards this surprise attack (such as a punch to the face)? Or am I going to allow my elbow to spiral out from my waist, limit my potential and speed, and aggravate my injury? I do this inside of class as well. I'm thinking 'cause & effect', what's causing my Bong to not work as well as it could?
I'm talking ACTIVE ENGAGEMENT.

Martial Arts aren't supposed to be about an esoteric hobby you tell your friends about to be that cool/alternative hippie loving, crystal-healing, "I TOUCHED MY CHI!!!" guy...or gal.
A lot of us get into it to protect ourselves. We're either afraid, hurt, or we're damaged in another way.
The rest are, I'd like to think, still genuinely interested...they just don't have our issues.

The class isn't for a learning process like we experienced when were going to school and had 30 other students overwhelming a frazzled teacher. It's for you to experiment with your sticking points, to get advice from your teacher, and maybe to learn something new.
An analogy popped up last night.
"Some people come to class and are essentially blackboards. The have the potential to record information for use later, however as soon as individuals leave the class, this board gets cleared and all that's left behind may be an impression or hint...but the body of the lesson is gone."
I've noticed that the ones who have difficulty are the ones that don't think too deeply about the 'motion', or analyse the trajectory of their intent. This goes for practiced martial artists and n00bs.
The importance of this intent, or conscious awareness, is huge.

Where is your intent? Or as the Pixies put it..."Where is my mind?"
Are you looking at this conditioning and concerning yourself with why it doesn't work? Is it you? Is it your training partner? Is it we both?
I don't accept that it's because I'm shit. Nor will I accept its because my partner is shit.
It doesn't work because I'm still learning it. It doesn't work because there's an aspect I haven't taken into account. It doesn't work because I'm too busy thinking about the move that's supposed to follow my Bong Sao.
It doesn't work because my mind isn't intent on what I'm doing. I'm either thinking of what I've done, what I'm going to do, or dinner, or b00bs, or not hurting my little training partner, or not being hurt by my strong/wiley/fast/smart/<insert positive description> partner.
The simple distinction is that if I clear my mind, concentrate on the moment, and actively engage myself within the moment I can then potentially walk away with a deeper understanding. I'm not even sure if I'm making sense here. Most likely I'm merely waffling on about a concept which is important, and trivializing it through my ignorance.